San Francisco police are trying to determine who is responsible for a rash of flipped over Smart Cars.
- Police are on the lookout for three-year olds with Red Bull in their Sippy cups.
- If the cars are so "Smart"...how come they keep letting themselves get flipped over?
- I remember when "Car Tipping" was something you did when you handed your keys to the valet.
*****
Kirstie Alley is joining Jenny Craig...as a Client...10 years after serving as their spokesperson.
- She chose Jenny Craig after weighing all her options and the scale broke.
*****
A second report has surfaced claiming that Al Sharpton was a paid informant for the FBI against the Mob in the 80's. He admits wearing a wire at several Mafia restaurants...but says he wasn't a rat.
- The FBI says they didn't get any good info from Sharpton since his gold medallion shorted out the wire.
- He may have been a snitch...but you gotta admit he was one snappy dresser!
*****
Barbara Walters has announced that she's leaving "The View" in May.
- Rumor has it she's going to "60 Minutes" to help bring in a younger audience.
*****
A study at Brandeis University found that forgiving yourself is the key to living longer.
- It seems to work for everybody, except for one group: Suicide bombers.
*****
Oscar Pistorious said his girlfriend "felt loved" the night she died.
- Apparently that part happened right before she "felt dead".
- He said he would send her somewhere she'd never been before and he did. The morgue.
*****
Rob Lowe says there's a bias in show business against good looking people.
- So I'm guessing Rob's never seen an episode of "Duck Dynasty".
*****
RIP... My good friend - the incredibly funny John Pinette. John died over the weekend at the age of 50...much too young. He will be missed.
I'll see you back here Thursday...
-Dick