A new Yahoo survey found that 62% of Senior Citizens are satisfied with their sex lives.
- The other 38% haven't figured out that you're supposed to do more than just sit in bathtubs next to each other in the backyard.
- Great...now I can't get the image of Larry King in suspenders and boxer shorts out of my mind.
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Paul McCartney announced that he will induct Ringo Star into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.
- Call me crazy but shouldn't Ringo have been inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame years ago??
- Yoko Ono is not invited to the ceremony, so all she'll get is a "Photograph".
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Kim Jong Un will visit Moscow to celebrate the 70th Anniversary of the Soviet Union's victory over Nazi Germany.
- Let's hope he doesn't get any "let's go shirtless" ideas from Vladimir Putin.
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The Secret Service asked Congress for $8 Million to build a replica of the White House where they can train new agents.
- They say it will be an exact replica with an Oval Office, a West Wing and no lock on the front door.
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Mitt Romney is scheduled to take on Evander Holyfield in a Boxing match to raise money for charity in May.
- Mitt's invitation to Evander read, "Friend, Countrymen, Lend Me What's Left Of Your Ear."
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Kanye West posted naked photos of his wife Kim Kardashian on Twitter.
- In other Breaking News...the sun came up this morning.
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Prince Harry announced that after ten years of service, he's leaving the British Army.
- He's going to join the German Army because he likes their uniforms better.
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Have a great day and I'll see you back here tomorrow!
-Dick