Ben & Jerry's is giving away free Bernie Sanders-inspired ice cream ahead of the New York primaries. 

- It comes on a stick and is known as a "Metamu-cicle". 

- They say it's part of their "Redistribution of Ice Cream" Program. 

*****

Top Hillary Clinton staffer Huma Abedin (aka Mrs. Anthony Weiner) says the first time she saw Hillary she thought "Oh my God...she's so beautiful". 

- Bill said, "Seriously? Are you talking about MY Hillary?"

*****

Sarah Palin posted a Facebook photo of herself holding a dead boar alongside a message supporting Donald Trump. 

- Donald immediately said she was ugly... then sent out a clarification saying he was talking about the boar. 

*****

A new survey shows that 25% of people have used a sick day to take care of their pet. 

- The same survey showed that Dogs were grateful, but Cats were like, "Fine. But where are you taking me for Spring Break?" 

*****

An new study shows that the average "physical interlude" lasts 5.4 minutes. 

- See ladies? You haven't been giving men enough credit!

*****

Villanova beat North Carolina to become NCAA Champs last night with a three-point shot at the buzzer. 

- Now the only thing left of "March Madness" is this April cold weather. 

*****

Have a great day and I'll see you back here Wednesday!

-Dick