Caitlyn Jenner went Prime Time last night and revealed that she had Bruce's private parts surgically removed in January. 

- The surgery is known in the industry as the "Voluntary Bobbitt". 

*****

President Trump is demanding Congressional funding for the Mexican border wall or say's he'll shut down the government. 

- Right now the only thing scarier than the government shutting down is the government staying open. 

*****

Meanwhile a Washington Post/ABC News Poll found that if the election were held today, Trump would still beat Hillary 43% to 40%. Meanwhile, former President Obama has agreed to give a speech to a bunch of Wall Street Bankers in September... for $400,000. 

- They actually wanted Hillary, but her speaking fee was too high. 

*****

Former Fox News Anchor Bill O'Reilly spoke out about the sexual allegations against him for the first time Monday, saying "The truth will come out" and "America will be shaken". 

- Ironically, "Shaken" is how he served the martinis he gave the women he allegedly invited back to his hotel room. 

*****

New Orleans is taking down Confederate Monuments in an effort to rid the city of those symbols. 

- However whistling the song "Dixie" is still allowed. 

*****

North Korea detained a U.S. citizen for unknown reasons at Pyongyang Airport. 

- This kind of stuff never happened when they thought Dennis Rodman was the President. 

*****

Have a great day and I'll see you back here Wednesday!

-Dick