A Broadway producer says he’s been given the green light for “Liberace: The Musical”.

- His original choice had been “My Fair Lady”… but then he realized it was already taken.

*****

A 35-year-old Sheboygan man was sentenced to 150 days in jail for clogging women's toilets with empty soda bottles… something he says he just “had the urge to do”.

- His soda bottle of choice? Squirt.

*****

Reservations to Taco Bell’s new hotel in Palm Springs sold out in two minutes.

- It’s the only hotel in history where the maid turns down your bed and leaves a bottle of Gas X on the pillow.

*****

Arby’s is putting a new twist on the “Burgers made from Vegetables” trend by announcing the release of “Megetables” - Vegetables made out of meat - including a carrot make out of turkey.

- There hasn’t been this much confusion about where something comes from since McDonald’s introduced the McNuggets.

*****

Kim Kardashian is going to rename her “Kimono” fashion line after being criticized for cultural appropriation.

- In a related story, a group of Baboons is criticizing Kim’s butt for the same thing.

*****

Joe Biden’s son Hunter told “The New Yorker” that first, he hooked up with his sister-in-law after going on a crack binge and then he married his new wife just one week after he met her.

- This guy makes Billy Carter seem like a campaign asset.

- Hunter’s got a real eye for the ladies. While his Dad, Joe has a real NOSE for the ladies.

*****

Thomas Jefferson’s birthday, April 13, will no longer be a holiday in the Founding Father’s hometown of Charlottesville, Virginia because Jefferson was a slave owner in the 1700’s.

- NOTE: He also happened to write the Declaration of Independence!!

*****

Have a great 3rd of July and I’ll see you back here on the 4th!

-Dick