This afternoon, President Biden will welcome two Turkeys to the Lawn of the White House in order to issue the traditional Presdiential Thanksgiving Pardon.

- When I heard “turkey” and “pardon” I assumed Hunter was going to be there… but it turns out it’s just two actual birds from Minnesota named “Peach” and “Blossom”.

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The self-described Socialist mayor of Paris, France is backing a city council motion to ban SUVs in the French Capital, saying they are “Weapons used to attack the French”.

-Expecially the GERMAN SUV’s.

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Former President Bill Clinton claimed he “had a feeling” that all the swing states would swing in unison this past election cycle.

-And if anybody knows about “Swinging”… it’s Bill.

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A major storm expected to hit the Northeast threatens to put a damper on the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade in NYC. With temps in the upper 40’s and rain all day… forecasters say it will be messy, but the balloons should be able to fly.

- And with everyone looking up at the floats… it will be that much easier for the muggers to go through parade-goers pockets!

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A new study finds that texting abbreviations like IDK for “I don’t know” or GOAT for “greatest of all time” make the texter seem insincere.

-BTW…. That’s just an FYI.

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SeaWorld San Diego is celebrating the 40th Birthday of the oldest known Macaroni Penguin in North America.

- Didn’t I just see a commercial for “Unlimited Macaroni Penguin” at Olive Garden? I know I did… It came with Soup, Salad and Endless Breadsticks!

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Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Tuesday!

-Dick