Secretary of State Hillary Clinton said that a terrorist group’s Internet claim of responsibility for the Benghazi attack means nothing and should not be believed.
- But I read in on Terrorist-apedia! It has to be true!
A new survey has found that Americans in their late 30’s are now the group that doubts they’ll be financially secure after retirement.
- Of course that’s assuming they’ll actually have a job to retire from.
- So in the future, “Retirement Community” will actually mean “Mom & Dad’s Basement”.
A scientist claims that a new study proves that PMS is a myth.
- After fathering six daughters I can honestly say that the the only “myth” is that this guy is a scientist.
It’s a good news/bad news day for Lindsay Lohan. She won’t face charges in her latest hit-and-run case in New York, but the National Enquirer claims that she took $15,000 worth of clothing from the set of “Scary Movie 5”. They claim producers let it go…considering it’s part of the cost of hiring Lindsay Lohan.
- Her publicist insists she didn’t “take” the clothes, she just sold them for beer money.
MSNBC’s Chris Matthews claimed that if he had decided to run for Senate, he could’ve been a star in the Democratic party.
- He would not only have had “a tingle” up his leg,
but he could have taught Joe Biden how to interrupt and make faces… oh wait, Joe already knows how to do that!
On this day in 1936 a radio station in Berlin broadcast the first call-in request show, called “You Ask - We Play”.
- The first caller was an A. Hitler who asked to hear “Eva-destruction”.
Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday with an ALL NEW PODCAST!
-Dick
P.S. Come on Tigers!
Tigers go after the Giants tonight in Game One of the World Series in San Francisco! First pitch 8:07 Detroit time with Justin Verlander!
Donald Trump says that he has huge game-changing information about President Obama that he will reveal this afternoon.
- Rumor has it that it either involves a one-time divorce filing OR that Biden is actually Obama’s “Crazy Uncle Joe”.
A new study says that eating bacon makes a male orgasm more difficult during sex.
- Especially if he’s eating the bacon in the middle of his local Denny’s at the time.
- This is why they call government money spent for stupid surveys “Pork”.
The world’s biggest bra, nearly as big as two tennis courts, is being auctioned off for charity with a starting bid of $800.
- It was originally used by Dolly Parton as a training bra.
A study found that browsing in an art gallery can help cure constipation.
- It’s especially effective if you’re looking at a painting by Vincent Van GO!
In the latest Superman comic book, Clark Kent quits his job as a reporter for the Daily Planet.
- And takes a job with TMZ so he can spot misbehaving celebs with his x-ray vision!
On this day in 1939 Nylon stockings were first sold to the public.
- And there was an immediate run on them!
Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday!
Go Tigers!
-Dick
The World Series is set with SanFrancisco’s win over defending World Series champs St. Louis last night 9-0. Game One: Wednesday night in SF, 8pm our time. Verlander will be on the mound.
GO TIGERS!!!
As expected, both Dems and Repubs are claiming victory in last night’s 3rd and final debate between Barack Obama and Mitt Romney.
- 5% think Obama won, 5% think Romney won, and 90% think the Lions lost… which they did, to the Bears, 13-7.
American Airlines has announced that they will charge $25 if you want a pillow and blanket.
- And another hundred bucks if you want a seat that doesn’t come loose and move around the cabin.
The National Enquirer is claiming that sources say O.J. Simpson is trying to sell the knife used to kill his wife Nicole and her friend Ron Goldman for $5 million dollars.
- It’s listed on e-Bay as “Previously Used”.
- O.J. denies the rumor, but says he’ll address it in his new book, “If I Sold It”.
Chicago is proposing a 5-cent tax on every bullet sold in the city.
- Great. Do you realize how many more armed robberies criminals are going to have to commit to raise the cash they need for ammo?
British scientists claim they have discovered what makes a perfect beer.
- Americans have known it for years…it’s called “a refrigerator”.
Lindsay Lohan will sit down with Barbara Walters for a one-on-one interview.
- They’ll do the interview in one take…that is if Lindsay doesn’t take the necklace and earrings that Barbara’s wearing first.