At a speech in Washington, DC last night, Veep Joe Biden said that the standing joke in the White House is that “Barack is learning to speak without a teleprompter; I’m learning to speak with one.” 

- Obama had no comment as his teleprompter was down. 

- Meanwhile White House Spokesman Jay Carney says the White House had no knowledge about the use of teleprompters until they read it in a newspaper article yesterday. 

***** 

Lois Lerner, the IRS official in the “non-profit group unit” who apologized for targeting conservative groups, plans to “Take the Fifth” and refuse to testify before a House Investigative Committee. 

- Nothing says “I didn’t do anything illegal” like taking the Fifth!  

***** 

Porn stars are complaining that the big banks are suddenly refusing to accept money that comes from the porn industry. 

- You don’t want to screw with porn stars! 

***** 

A new study finds that 10 percent of Facebook users aren’t human. 

- So a lot of your FB friends aren’t only fake…they’re aliens! 

***** 

O.J. Simpson says if he can get his armed robbery conviction overturned, he’s going to go on a nationwide tour to speak about the Nicole Brown murder case. 

- Right…like he know’s anything about THAT! 

- He’s already telling inmates he’s hired Kato Kaelin as his opening act. 

***** 

A British driver said it’s a miracle that George Michael walked away alive after he fell out of a car at 70mph on a freeway and she nearly ran over him. 

- Luckily, she wasn’t asleep at the wheel…which George usually is. 

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday! And don’t forget to check out my latest Podcast (#79) up now on the homepage! 

-Dick

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