There’s a company that makes wigs for babies who are born bald.
- So between the wig, no teeth and diapers, babies are basically just miniature old people.
*****
To show how sexy and beloved he is, North Korean leader Kim Jong Un realeased a photo of cute young female workers mobbing him at a mushroom festival.
- Un threatened to have them thrown in prison when he found out they were whispering “There’s a Fung-Gus-Among-Gus”.
*****
Business Insider says the chance of winning the $1 million grand prize in McDonald’s Monopoly game is 1 in 3 billion.
- Which is just slightly better odds than the guy at the drive-thru getting your order right.
- They should change their sign to “2 Billion, 999,999,999 NOT served!”
*****
New research says that we yawn because we need to cool off our brains.
- I just stick my head in the freezer for a few minutes.
*****
Boy Scouts considered to be “obese” were left out of this year’s Boy Scout Jamboree.
- Unbelievable…but “on my honor” it’s true!
- Instead of giving the usual Boy Scout two-finger salute, the boys who were left out used just one finger instead.
- The obese boys blamed it on eating too many Girl Scout Cookies.
*****
Oprah Winfrey has signed Lindsay Lohan to star in a new Reality Show on her OWN Network.
- This is the first time Linsay will be involved in anything resembling “reality” in years.
- It’s been tentatively called “The Biggest Boozer”.
*****
Kim Kardashian was mocked after she tweeted about the injustice of acquitting a killer. Fans quickly reminded her that her late dad Robert Kardashian was one of O.J. Simpson’s lawyers.
- Kim responded “Who’s O.J.?”
- Followed by “Who’s Robert Kardashian?”
*****
Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday with an all new Podcast - #86!
-Dick