Leo Di Caprio held a secret meeting with The Donald at Trump Tower yesterday to explain how "Going Green" could help create jobs. 

- Leo's so obsessed with Climate Change, a lot of people are starting to admit they wish he'd really gone down on the Titanic. 

*****

Donald Trump was voted "Man of the Year" by Time Magazine, but the Prime Minister of India won the reader's online vote. 

- Hillary could have taken the popular vote if only she's spent more time in the battleground areas of Calcutta and Mumbai. 

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Hillary will throw a Holiday themed party at the Plaza in NYC on December 15th for all of her Millionaire donors. 

- Tickets to the party are pricey... but include a FREE speech by Hillary! 

*****

For the first time since 2000, the average life span for an American has gone down. 

- But researchers admit the data was affected by people who were offed by their relatives during Thanksgiving dinner because of their political views.  

*****

The Iranian Government has opened a new theme park for "Revolutionary Children" featuring checkpoints, AK-47's and full Military Gear for the kids. 

- Makes "Mr. Toad's Wild Ride" seem kind of tame. 

*****

Giraffes have been put on the world's "Endangered Species Watch List". 

- Apparently they're doing a lot of "necking" but are never getting to the "reproducing" part. 

*****

A study by Rover.com found that the growing trend is for dog owners to give their pooches human names. 

- If only celebrities would catch on to this trend with their kids. 

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A University of Michigan study revealed that parents spend an average of 9 hours and 22 minutes everyday using media and technology. 

- It would have been longer, but they had to take a break to yell at their kids to stop playing with their phones and go play outside. 

*****

Have a great day and I'll see you back here Friday!

-Dick