I hate to break your heart... but the NY Post has confirmed that the Spice Girls WILL NOT be reuniting for a performance at the Royal Wedding. 

- I haven't been this disappointed since "Toots Dentino and his Hot Diggity Dogs" backed out of their gig at my Dad's wedding to my Step-Mother.  

*****

The Judge in the Bill Cosby case says the 80 year old, who's facing a likely 10 years behind bars, will be sentenced in September.  

- Bill's so nervous that, unlike his dates, he's barely getting any sleep. 

*****

Kim Jong Un is threatening to cancel his upcoming summit with President Trump because of joint military exercises between the US and S. Korea which KJU says are "Practice for an Invasion". 

- And Lil Kim's waistline make it look like HE's practicing for an EXPLOSION.

*****

Gayle King told Vanity Fair magazine that her best friend Oprah Winfrey smokes a little marijuana every now and again. 

- I knew it! She WAS high when she gave everyone in her audience a new car! 

*****

A Russian woman purported to be the oldest living person ever at 128 says she hasn't lived a single happy day in her life and her longevity is "a punishment from God".

- Lucky for her, people who are named "The Oldest Person Alive" usually die a week later, so hang on, it's almost over. 

*****

No matter what year you were born, you may be part of the "Indoor Generation"... the name scientists are giving to the nearly 25% of Americans who spend 21 to 24 hours EVERY DAY indoors. 

- There's another name for them: "Convicts". 

*****

Have a great day and I'll see you back here Thursday!

-Dick