Diana de Vegh - an 83-year old grandmother of 2 who is legally blind and a Therapist in NYC - has revealed that she had a 4-year affair with JFK that began when she was 20 and he was 40 - and vows never to have an affair with an older man again.

- Well… since she’s 83… the chances of that NOT happening are pretty good.

- This reminds me… after my Mother died, my Dad married a woman 28 years younger than him - and a couple of years younger than ME. It sure made the “Step-Mommy/Step-Son Dinner Dance” a little awkward.

*****

Royal Insiders believe that Prince Harry and Meghan Markle will fade into obscurity over the next ten years.

- I give ‘em ten more MINUTES.

- I think I speak on behalf of a grateful nation when I say, “Don’t let the door hit you on the butt on your way out”.

*****

Secretary of State Anthony Blinken says the U.S. will retaliate if ISIS-K attacks America or its allies.

- “ISIS-K” sounds like a Breakfast Cereal to me. But one that’s slightly more explosive than Fiber One.

- Which reminds me of one of my favorite lines by the late great comic Dennis Wolfberg who used to appear on my radio show when he was in town. He said: “You cannot eat Fiber One and hold a job

*****

A Mom and Dad in Michigan have been ordered to pay $30,000 to their son to compensate him for his “Extensive Pornography Collection” that they threw out after he left their home.

- The “Woke” Judge also ordered his parents to give the boy a “Participation Trophy”.

*****

According to new research, eating half-a-cup of walnuts each day REDUCES the risk of heart disease and lowers cholesterol by around 8.5%. Last week, they told us that eating a Hot Dog SHORTENS your life by 36 minutes.

- So today, I’m going to have a hot dog with mustard and chopped walnuts. It should only shave about 14 minutes off my life… Talk about a Win-Win!

*****

The Center for Disease Control has issued new language guidelines that aim to get rid of dehumanizing words like “Elderly”.

- So from now on, older people will be known as “Those Discouraged From Buying Green Bananas”.

- Remember when your Mom told you that “Sticks and stones can break your bones but words will never hurt you”? Apparently, she was wrong.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Tuesday!

-Dick