A 75-year-old nudist was arrested in Lyon, France over the weekend for allegedly attacking a 46-year-old man on a nudist beach. Reason: He broke “Breaking Nudist Beach Protocol”.

- There’s “Nudist Beach Protocol”?? (Asking for a friend…)

*****

A shoplifter WEARING AN ANKLE MONITOR was caught on a security camera filling a bag with bottles of liquor at a Target store in Chicago while staff stood by and did nothing.

- Wait… They sell booze at Target?

*****

Velveeta is now selling a Velveeta Mac and Cheese Martini.

- Yum.

- But there’s a catch… It’s cost 5 bucks and you have to pay for it in Kraft American Singles.

*****

The Wall Street Journal reports that more and more people are taking yoga classes that involve smoking pot.

- I've seen the poses they make you do in Yoga... and frankly, I'd have to smoke more joints than Willie Nelson to get my joints to bend like that.

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A Florida woman was arrested after she was spotted wandering the parking lot of a supermarket highly intoxicated with a pitchfork in one hand and a black whip in the other.

- Is it just me or does that sound like the opening scene of a Lifetime movie??

*****

Charles Manson's self-proclaimed grandson has produced a birth certificate 'proving' he's the sole heir to Manson’s estate meaning he could inherit his Grandfather’s possissions which could be worth $$$.

- I mean sure… it’s not the same as going fishing or killing people with Grandpa… but it’s something.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday!

-Dick