HAIL TO THE VICTORS!

Congrats to the Michigan Wolverines who are the 2024 NATIONAL CHAMPIONS after last night’s decisive 34-13 win over the Washington Huskies!

This is Michigan’s first National Championship of the millennium, with their last coming in 1997. That was 27 years ago! We didn’t have Smartphones or Self-Driving Cars back then… and the biggest Political Scandal was Bill Clinton’s sexual escapades.

- I guess the more things change… The more some things stay the same.

*****

A new study reveals that exposing toddlers to screen time can lead to difficulties in processing their surroundings.

- Well this is really bad news for Apple’s New “Inter-Uterus-My-First-iPhone” they were planning on marketing to the lucrative “Pre-Born” market.

*****

A new Delaware bill aims to allow bird hunting on Sunday.

- Not surprisingly, the Bird Hunting Bill is supported by both the Left Wing & Right Wing of Congress.

*****

A Russian singer has been arrested for performing a concert wearing nothing but a Sock on his…. Manhood… and has been charged with “Minor Hooliganism”.

- The singer’s lawyer says his client, “Will take responsibility for his actions… but ‘takes exception’ with the characterization that his ‘Hooligaism’ was ‘Minor’”.

*****

The “Drunkards Association of Ghana” have taken up the challenge to set a Guinness World Record by having a one-week non-stop drinking party. FYI… This is serious business: The Ghana Drunkards Association have more than 10 million members.

- They even have a theme song: Prince’s “Tonight we’re Ghana Party Like It’s 1999!”.

*****

A new study proves that mice can indeed recognize themselves in the mirror.

- And, as it turns out, they think they look “Fat”… just like the rest of us.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Wednesday!

-Dick