Remember how they told us that a glass or two of red wine was good for our hearts? Yeah… well it turns out that may not be true. For starters… The key ingredient, “Resveratrol” has ONLY BEEN TESTED ON MICE… not humans - and - experts now say, you’d have to drink between 100 and 1000 glasses of Red Wine per day to get an amount equivalent to the dose that improved health in the Mouse Population.

- Well, Life may be a Cabernet, Ol Chum. But apparently drinking Red Wine isn’t gonna make it last any longer.

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President Biden’s frequent use of the shorter ladder while boarding Air Force One has raised eyebrows. There is now a Secret Service agent assigned to stand at the bottom of the staircase - just in case there is any “mishap”.

- It’s so obvious, they’re now calling them the “Not So Secret Service”.

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The NY Times claims that the White House has been “extremely upset” about their coverage of the President’s age and signs of his mental decline.

- It’s so bad that while telling us how “sharp and energetic” Joe is, White House Spokesperson KJP will wear a pair of pants that are actually ON FIRE.

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Lawmakers in New York City are pushing a ban on Tide Pods and other single-use laundry detergent products in the name of “Climate Consciousness”.

- Why?? Now Wearing CLEAN CLOTHES is bad for the environment??

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64 year old Madonna fell off a chair onto the stage during a performance in Seattle… but got back up, laughed it off and continued with her concert… receiving massive applause from the audience.

- Of course there was downside. At her age… every time the audience claps… the lights in the auditorium go on and off……. The Clapper!!!

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A new study reveals that movie theater seats are “harboring thousands of bacteria colonies, including mold” that can transfer onto your clothes while you’re enjoying the show.

- Which actually sounds like the plot of one of the movies I saw a preview for the last time I actually saw a movie in a theater.

- Amazingly, the “Bacteria Colonies” are actually BETTER for you than a large tub of popcorn with melted butter and a large Diet Coke.

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Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Wednesday!

-Dick