A New Jersey shopping mall is charging kids $50 to sit on Santa's lap.
- And for $75 dollars, the kids' Dads can get Santa's Helper "Mistletoe" to give them a lap dance.
- Remember the good old days when your kids could sit on Santa's lap and wet their pants for free?
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Soccer star David Beckham has been named People magazine's "Sexist Man Alive" for 2015.
- Meanwhile "Oppressed People Magazine" chose Kim Jong Un as it's "Sexist Dictator Alive" for the 5th year running.
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Bill Clinton will be on the campus of MSU tonight to deliver a speech on Public Service.
- And if anybody knows about being serviced by the public, it's Bill Clinton.
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The CIA now believes that ISIS planned the Paris Attacks on a Playstation 4.
- They're now looking for two additional suspects known only as "Mario" and "Luigi".
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Between 11am and 3pm tomorrow, people in and around Detroit can order a flu shot which will be delivered to their homes by Uber within 10 minutes for just 10 bucks.
- This is a change for Uber which usually delivers PEOPLE to their homes after they've had too many Shots.
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The Oxford English Dictionary has named "Emoji" as their word of the year.
- The news was greeted by hundreds of thousands of Happy Faces on Twitter.
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Taco Bell announced that by the end of 2016, they'll use only "cage free" eggs in their breakfast wraps.
- The move is in line with the "meat free meat" they've been serving in their Tacos since they opened in 1962.
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Have a great day and I'll see you back here Thursday!
-Dick