A new study found that male baboons get major health benefits from having PLATONIC friendships with female baboons.

- Proving once again that Males CAN be friends with Females without there being any Monkey Business.

*****

Scientists are baffled by a large amount of squirrels that have been washing up on the shores of Lake Michigan.

- I’m no Nautical Scientist or Climatologist, but my theory is the squirrels were thrown overboard when their cruise ship the “Rodent of the Seas” hit an iceberg and sank.

*****

President Trump and Joe Biden are preparing for tomorrow night’s 1st Debate.

- Trump’s working on his spray tan and Joe’s taking a nap.

*****

They will NOT shake hands before the debate because of COVID-19.

- Well that… Plus the fact that they can’t stand each other.

*****

The NY Times claims that Prez. Trump deducted 70 Grand on his taxes for Hair Styling.

- Biden replied, “70 Grand is nothing to sniff at”.

*****

Supreme Court Nominee Amy Coney Barrett is the mother of 7 kids.

- No matter how you feel about her views, you gotta agree that anyone with 7 kids must be pretty good at settling arguments.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Tuesday!

-Dick