A new poll found 29% of Americans think their political differences are “so irreconcilable” that they support their state seceding from the U.S.

- I’ve got an idea… How about we let California and New York go first??

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A third woman who came forward to accuse NY Governor Cuomo of inappropriate sexual behavior at a 2019 Wedding says he grabbed her and tried to kiss her on the lips without her permission.

- On a bright note… He didn’t send her to a Nursing Home.

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Meanwhile, Cuomo teared up and apologized for making anyone “uncomfortable” during a Press Conference about the sexual harassment charges against him but said he will not resign.

- Some said it was better than Bill Clinton’s apology about Monica. I thought it was Close… but no Cigar.

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In a shocking teaser for the big Oprah interview set for this Sunday, Meghan Markle refers to the Royal Family as “The Firm” and accuses her In-Laws of spreading lies about her and Harry.

- I’m with Meghan. I mean who died and made Elizabeth the Queen???

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A new study says 65% of college students have skipped buying Text Books during the pandemic.

- The students said, “What do we need Text Books for?? We already KNOW how to Text!”

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Universal Orlando has said it’s “evaluating” the future of a popular kids’ play area named after one of the six Dr. Seuss books pulled from publication this week over alleged racism.

- How long before Cedar Point takes down the water ride “Shoot the Rapids” for inciting violence and renames “Frontier Town”… “Oppressive Area of White Cowboy Privilege”.

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The Orbital Assembly Corporation has announced plans to build the “Voyager Station” - the galaxy’s first hotel in space.

- With my luck, I’ll get the room next to the ice machine.

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Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday!

-Dick

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