A 35-year-old man Pennsylvania man was arrested after he stripped naked at a gas station, exposed his genitals, then jumped into a freezer full of bagged ice.

- This guy’s not “Regular”…. He’s definitely not “Premium”… He’s more the “Unleaded” type.

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In an interview over the weekend, Dr. Fauci agreed that his fame has “Skyrocketed” since the Pandemic, and admitted that he has a throw pillow with his face on it at his home.

-I know a lot of people who would love to have a pillow with Fauci’s face on it that they could THROW…

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Two female “Climate Activists” threw two cans of Campbell’s tomato soup over Van Gogh’s famous “Sunflowers” painting at London’s National Gallery Saturday - before gluing themselves to the wall. The teens - who are part of the group “Just Stop Oil” - were arrested - but the painting valued at $82 MILLION was undamaged - as it was covered in glass.

- I’m glad that the painting is okay… but what a waste of good Soup!

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Just in time for the Holidays… Anheuser-Busch is introducing it’s new pooch-friendly Turkey-flavored “Dog Brew”. It’s made from Bone Broth, IS SAFE for humans to drink, but “Is specifically made for a Dog’s refined palate”.

- It’s alcohol free so you’re not gonna end up with a Schnockered Schnoodle.

- I’m okay with the Turkey Flavor and the Bone Broth… but the “Dog’s refined palate” which is usually your neighbors leg… Not so much.

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Across the United Kingdom, teenage environmentalists are pouring milk all over the floor in grocery stores to raise awareness about “Dairy Production Emissions”.

- These kids are about 4 Quarts short of a Gallon.

- Maybe we should change the campaign from “Got Milk??” to “Got BRAINS??”

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81-year-old billionaire New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft married his 47-year-old fiancé in a surprise ceremony Friday night.

- Ironically, the couple is registered at Lover’s Lane… but he’s not allowed to drive there at night.

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Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Tuesday!

-Dick