A Professor of History at Temple University who specializes in “Ufology” (The study of UFO’s) claims Aliens are currently abducting humans and using mind control techniques to integrate themselves into Earth’s societies in preparation for an impending invasion.

-So if the Ukrainian thing doesn’t work out for Putin… he can always form an alliance with the Aliens.

*****

Alec Baldwin’s wife Hilaria announced that although they thought their family was complete with six kids… She’s pregnant with the couples 7th!!!

- Wait… I thought Alec was her 7th child??

*****

74 year old O.J. Simpson tweeted that Will Smith was “Wrong” for slapping Chris Rock at the Oscars… but that he “Understood the feeling” - having “Wanted to ‘B**ch slap the comedians” who made fun of him during his murder trial.

- But he didn’t do it, cuz as his attorney would say, “Even if you Snap… You must not Slap!!!”

*****

Disney's Diversity and Inclusion Chief said that theme park visitors are no longer addressed as “Ladies and Gentleman, Boys and Girls” but are welcomed instead as “Dreamers and Friends”.

- Okay…. But how do we know which bathroom to use??? Are we “Dreamers” or “Friends”??

- I don’t mean to be a Dumbo here… but come on!

*****

The NFL says that every team must have a Minority Offensive Coach this season.

- They got the idea from the Lions… who at 3-13-1 this season - have a history of Offensive Coaching decisions.

*****

87 years after it hit the Silver Screen, the Tin Man's Oil Can from “The Wizard of Oz” sold for $250,000 to an unnamed bidder at an auction in California.

- Do you realize for $250,000 that guy could have filled up his tank with 59,665 gallons of gas??

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday!

-Dick