The U.S. set a new record for gas prices this week when the average cost at the pump topped $4-dollars a gallon in all 50 states for the first time ever.

- See?? We’re NOT DIVIDED as a Nation!!! We’re all going broke TOGETHER!!! One gallon of gas at a time…

*****

Speaking of gas… Students at John Hopkins University developed a new edible adhesive called “Tastee Tape” designed to hold Buritos together when you eat ‘em.

- Burritos?? I need something that will keep my Chalupas together.

*****

The White House announced that they are “Pausing” their controversial new “Disinformation Governance Board” because of…. “Disinformation”…. about what the boards role would be.

- This reminds me of a headline I once read (TRUE!!!): “Global Warming Conference in DC Cancelled Because of Blizzard”. You can’t make this stuff up kids! And amazingly, we don’t have to!!!

******

Inflation has caused food prices to skyrocket so much that a restaurant in NYC… Sal and Mookie’s Pizzeria… now lists a 15 piece order of Chicken Wings on their menu as “Market Price” - a description usually reserved for pricey entrees like Lobster.

- So men, we finally know what the Cummerbund on a tux is for… Use it to wipe the barbecue sauce off your fingers when you take your lady out for a Fancy Candlelight Wing Dinner!

*****

The NY Post is reporting that Netflix is in the middle of filming an “At Home with the Duke and Duchess of Sussex-Style” docu-series about Harry and Meghan & the Royal Family.

- I can’t wait!!! And I’ve even I’ve got some suggestions for episodes for the show… How about: “How I Met Your Domineering Mother”, “Meghan’s Never Going To Be Queen For A Day” and “The Biggest Losers”??

*****

Marvel has released a trailer for a new She-Hulk movie.

- In the Female version, she explodes out of her clothes and turns into the Hulk when anyone asks if her jeans make her butt look big.

*****

Reports continue that Vladimir Putin will soon be having surgery - although details are sketchy.

- The only thing we know for sure is it’s NOT Heart Surgery…. since he doesn’t have one.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday!

-Dick