It’s International Nose Picking Day! So no matter where you stand… Left Side or or Right Side… Let’s all come together today and Pick a Winner!
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JetBlue will begin implementing “surge pricing” for checked bags to counter what it says are increased costs associated with wages and fuel. TRANSLATION: You'll pay more to check a bag during peak travel times.
- I'm good with that as long as we can have "Surge Suing" where we can sue for more money if the door happens to fall off the plane during a "Peak time" during our flight.
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An animal rescue group in Connecticut treated a pair of drunk vultures with fluids and gave them “a big breakfast” after the birds got super drunk on food they found in a dumpster. A vet said the food had fermented causing the birds to become “wildly intoxicated”.
- On a bright note, With their experience of flying drunk… The Vultures are shoo-ins for jobs as Pilots at Southwest!
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The San Francisco Museum of Modern Art has unveiled a new collection of fancy Bongs used to smoke Marijauna. It's a celebration of the "Art of Cannabis Smoking".
- Or as Hunter Biden calls it... "Christmas in April!".
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Red Lobster is reportedly considering filing for Chapter 11 bankruptcy protection after significant financial blows, including an $11 million loss on their “Endless Shrimp” promotion last summer.
- Which is ironic… They lost $11 MILLION on Endless Shrimp… While I gained 5 pounds on “Too Many Cheddar Bay Biscuits”. Yum!
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A Walton County, Florida couple is facing felony charges after allegedly fraudulently attempting to claim a million-dollar lottery prize. Get this... They taped the halves of two different losing scratch-off tickets together to make one "Winning" ticket. Cops said the tape was “Blatantly obvious”.
- Well, Duh! That’s why I ALWAYS use Gorilla Glue when I piece tickets together to scam the lottery!!! HELLO!!!!!
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Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Wednesday!
-Dick