It’s finally here…. The first Presidential Debate is scheduled to start at 9 p.m. on CNN and is expected to be the most watched debate in history. With so much riding on tonight’s performance for both campaigns… rumors are flying about what will happen: Will Joe stay awake?? Will he call Trump a Convicted Felon? Will Trump lose his cool?? Will he bring up Hunter’s Convictions? What about the crisis at the Border? Will CNN be fair??? What am I going to have for lunch?? Wait… I just meant to “think” that last one - not actually “type” it. Oh well… stay tuned!

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Following his recent gun conviction, Hunter Biden's D.C. law license has been suspended.

- On a bright note… with no law licensce, this will free him up to spend more time on his hobbies: Painting and doing Drugs!

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According to a new study, a lack of sleep can make it extremely difficult to retain information.

- Not only that… but according to a new study… a lack of sleep can make it extremely difficult to retain information!

- Did I mention that I didn’t get much sleep last night?

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In New York, Delta has launched its most luxurious lounge ever at JFK Airport. The 39,000-square-foot “Delta One” lounge features a 140-seat bar & restaurant and a wellness center complete with “Serenity Rooms” and full-body Massage Chairs.

- It’s great for those who want to get perfectly relaxed before getting on a Boeing plane and almost dying.

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A 20 year old Video game player is charged with attempted murder after flying from New Jersey to Florida, breaking into another gamers home and trying to kill him with a hammer because he was, “a bad game player online”.

- This is why I play Solitaire. When I lose… The only one I have to blame is myself.

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On the heels of the Hooters Restaurant closures… Olive Garden announced they'll be raising prices heading into the summer.

- They’ve even got a new slogan… “When You’re Here… You’re Family That We’ve Decided to Charge More For Dinner!”

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Officials in California are closing 5 popular beaches in San Diego because the water is contaminated with Raw Sewage.

- Officials are warning that no one should have “Fun… Fun… Fun…” Until the Experts take the E. coli away.

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Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday!

-Dick