Air travel across Europe continues to be paralyzed after an Icelandic Volcano erupted last Wednesday, sending a huge cloud of ash miles into the air.  Thousands of flights have been cancelled… stranding countless passengers at airports around the globe.  Pictures taken from a satellite show a dramatic cloud drifting for thousands of miles across the European continent.  

- If you don’t feel like “Googling” those images, just imagine a picture taken from the top of Cheech and Chong’s tour bus.

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Spirit Airlines - which of course services Detroit, announced the other day that they will charge a $45 fee per CARRY-ON bag.  Well now that appears to be backfiring… Seven U.S. Senators called it ridiculous and proposed a tax on excessive baggage fees.  Now, five top U.S. carriers – including United, Delta and American have promised not to add a fee for carry on bags. 

- But just wait till you check out their new “Seatbelt Rental Fee”.

- I think passengers should be allowed to charge an “emotional baggage fee” to the guy sitting next to you who spends the entire flight telling you how his ex-wife screwed him over. 

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 “I Feel the Earth Move…”

Although Iran sits on several fault lines, a senior Islamic cleric says that‘s not the cause of recent earthquakes.  The real cause:  women!!  Ayatollah Kazem Sedighi claims that women who wear make-up or dress “inappropriately” inflame young mens’ desire, thus leading to extramarital affairs, which in turn cause earthquakes.

- If extramarital sex can cause seismic activity, then every city where Tiger Woods has ever played should be in ruins.

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Long Overdue…

If George Washington were alive today, he might face a hefty overdue library fine.  New York City’s oldest Library says one of its ledgers shows that the President took out two books in the late 1700’s – which he never returned.  Both books were due back on November 2nd, 1789.  The entry on Washington simply lists the borrower as “President”. The Library says they don’t want to collect a fine but would like the books back. 

- One of the books is said to have “I Heart Martha” scribbled in the margin.  The other one says, “The British Suck Rocks”.

- Washington isn’t the only President to be delinquent with checked-out books.  A Library in Arkansas is still hoping Bill Clinton will return, “A First-Grader’s Guide to the Kama Sutra” and “Really Curious George” which he checked out in elementary school. 

 

 

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