Wings vs. Blackhawks Game 1 of Round 2 of the Stanley Cup Playoffs tonight in Chicago! 8pm our time!
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Disney is considering adding a new ride that promises more spins, twists and turns than Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride.
- They’re calling it “The Obama White House”.
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Fox announced that Kiefer Sutherland will return in a new, limited series version of the show “24”.
- It will run over three nights and be called “8”, “8” & “8”.
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Lindsay Lohan is upset because the doctors at her rehab facility won’t let her have the Adderall pill she claims she needs to treat her Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder.
- She’s also upset that the only thing in her mini-bar is Diet Coke and Orange Juice.
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Convicted murderer Jodi Arias continues to insist that she wants to get the death penalty.
- With the media focused on the three White House Scandals instead of her, she figures she’s got nothing to live for.
- A prison guard overheard her saying, “Who do I have to kill to get some TV coverage in this town?”
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A cleric in Iran is warning that a big earthquake is on the way and it’s the fault of women who wear skimpy dresses.
- In Iran, “skimpy dresses” means burkas that only go down to your ankles.
- The cleric is known by the name “Nostra-Ridiculous”.
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It’s so hard to find a dentist under Britain’s National Health Service that thousands of Brits are buying do-it-yourself dental kits to glue down loose veneers and yank out their own teeth.
- My Grandpa had one of those kits…it came with a piece of string and a door knob.
- The most shocking part of this story is finding out that British people have any teeth at all.
- The story was leaked to the press by a disgrunted molar in the Health Department.
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Have a great day, I’ll see you back here Thursday and GO WINGS!!!
-Dick