With hair salons closed in much of the country, Prez Trump showed off a new grey doo in a Rose Garden Press Conference.

- He was immediately knocked by CNN and MSNBC for wearing hair that was the same color as Confederate Soldiers Uniforms in the Civil War.

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After polling at just 2%, Kanye West has dropped out of the 2020 Presidential Race.

- I guess the public just wasn’t ready for his slogan, “Make Big Butts Great Again”.

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Ghislaine Maxwell will be held in jail until her trial - a year from this month -because the Judge says she is “an extreme flight risk”.

- Why? Does she know somebody with cash and a private plane who might help her flee to some secret island??

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A new trend has teenagers posting videos of themselves dressing up like Senior Citizens in order to buy alcohol.

- So Ladies… if you see a guy in black socks and bermuda shorts picking up some booze, don’t assume it’s your husband.

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Dearborn’s own Squad Member Rashida Tlaib has attacked DTE claiming that power outages are caused by “systemic racism”. DTE denied the claim saying the power goes out because of why?? “Bad weather and Trees”.

- Ya know I’m starting to think Tlaib isn’t the brightest bulb in the Intelligence lamp.

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The NFL has partnered with Oakley Sunglasses on a new face shield that will protect players from the Coronavirus when and if the season resumes.

- But they still can’t come up with anything to protect Lion fans from years of disappointment.

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Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday!

-Dick