The White House announced that Joe Biden and First Lady Jill Biden will be attending President Elect Donald Trump’s Inauguration on January 20th.

-Well considering Joe put on a Red MAGA hat at one point and Jill wore a Red Dress on Election Day (True!)… maybe they’re going to the innauguration because… they VOTED FOR TRUMP??

*****

Yesterday, Special Counsel Jack Smith moved to dismiss all Federal Cases against Trump (which he brought) ... essentially ending what critics have called "Lawfare" that attemted to put Trump in prison for the rest of his life.

- Jack better hope Trump doesn’t get his name in the annual Federal Government Secret Santa Gift Exchange!

*****

Newly released data shows that more than 40% of Democrats believe Kamala Harris should be their Nominee for President again in 2028.

-I can think of about 1.2 BILLION reasons why Democrat donors might not let that happen...

*****

According to a new poll... the majority of Americans say their least favorite part of the Thanksgiving meal is... the Turkey.

- Not surprisingly, 100% of Turkeys surveyed agreed.

*****

Of all the places to retire inthe U.S.... a new study found more people in all 50 states want to move to the Villages in Florida than any other place - because of the great weather, dining, shopping, golf courses, performing arts & lifestyle amenities.

- Oh... and there's supposed to be a ton of drinking and sex, too.

*****

RIP... Chuck Woolery... The legendary game show host died Saturday at the age of 83. Woolery was the original host of both the daytime version of Wheel of Fortune (1975-1981) and Love Connection (1983-1994) and other shows and went on to host a Conservative Podcast.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Wednesday… The day before Thanksgiving!

-Dick

This afternoon, President Biden will welcome two Turkeys to the Lawn of the White House in order to issue the traditional Presdiential Thanksgiving Pardon.

- When I heard “turkey” and “pardon” I assumed Hunter was going to be there… but it turns out it’s just two actual birds from Minnesota named “Peach” and “Blossom”.

*****

The self-described Socialist mayor of Paris, France is backing a city council motion to ban SUVs in the French Capital, saying they are “Weapons used to attack the French”.

-Expecially the GERMAN SUV’s.

*****

Former President Bill Clinton claimed he “had a feeling” that all the swing states would swing in unison this past election cycle.

-And if anybody knows about “Swinging”… it’s Bill.

*****

A major storm expected to hit the Northeast threatens to put a damper on the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade in NYC. With temps in the upper 40’s and rain all day… forecasters say it will be messy, but the balloons should be able to fly.

- And with everyone looking up at the floats… it will be that much easier for the muggers to go through parade-goers pockets!

*****

A new study finds that texting abbreviations like IDK for “I don’t know” or GOAT for “greatest of all time” make the texter seem insincere.

-BTW…. That’s just an FYI.

*****

SeaWorld San Diego is celebrating the 40th Birthday of the oldest known Macaroni Penguin in North America.

- Didn’t I just see a commercial for “Unlimited Macaroni Penguin” at Olive Garden? I know I did… It came with Soup, Salad and Endless Breadsticks!

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Tuesday!

-Dick

With Elon Musk an advisor to the incoming Trump Administration…Trump’s “Presidential” motorcade now includes a Tesla Cybertruck.

-Well they call the Presidential Limo "The Beast"... but compared to the Cybertruck, I'm thinking the Limo might be "The Beauty".🤔

*****

President Biden turned 82 years old yesterday… becoming the nation’s oldest serving President.

-His staff celebrated by throwing him a Surprise party… The Suprise? America realizing he’s still President. 🥳

*****

Speaking of B-Days… Leonardo DiCaprio was photographed sporting a gray beard after returning from his 50th Birthday Celebration in Europe.

Leo’s really maturing. I hear he’s only dating women over 25 now. 👍🏻.

*****

Ellen DeGeneres and her wife Portia De Rossi announced that they've left the country and moved to England permanently following Donald Trumps victory.

-Any chance she packed Robert De Niro & Bruce Springsteen in her Suitcase? They announced yesterday they're leaving the US because of Trump’s win, too.

*****

Jose Ibarra… the illegal migrant who sexually assaulted and murdered Georgia nursing student Laken Riley has been found Guilty on All Counts and will spend the rest of his life in Prison.

-How long that life will be will be up to his fellow inmates.

*****

Matt Gaetz has withdrawn his name from consideration for Trump’s Attorney General after much controversey…

-Is it just me or is it the first time in history that people are paying attention to Presidential Cabinet picks like they're binge-watching movies on Netflix? Pass the popcorn! 🍿

*****

A Canadian grandmother made her way into Guinness Book of World Records by completing an astounding 1,575 pushups in one hour. (True!)

How’d she do it? She tripped on the way to the fridge to grab a beer… and it took her 1,575 tries to get back up.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday!

-Dick

Katie Couric took a swipe at Vice President Kamala Harris for her non-answers in various interviews leading up to the presidential election, saying she wanted Kamala to, “Answer the G… D…-Question, you know?”

- I guess if Katie had really wanted to help Kamala win, she would have spoken up, “Before the G… D… Election, you know?”, but maybe that’s just me.

*****

Millions across the U.S. will be blasted by winter storms ahead of busy Thanksgiving travel.

Which is Mother Nature’s way of getting you out of having to avoid those “Who did you vote for” while passing the mashed potatoes conversations.

*****

A recent study found that Ancient Egyptians may have been using hallucinogens in their ancient rituals to induce a state of creativity and euphoria.

- Well, Steve Martin told us that King Tut was buried with a Monkey… and now we finally know how he got so “Funky”!

- It also explains why the Bangles got famous teaching people how to “Walk Like an Egyptian”.

*****

Moviegoers who spoke to NBC News say they hope that people don’t attempt to sing along when “Wicked” the movie adaption of the popular broadway musical hits theaters this week.

- I felt the same way when “Saving Private Ryan” came out.

*****

Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson's $250 MILLION dollar film “Red One” bombed on opening weekend, as it earned just $34.1 million despite the massive budget and star-studded cast.

-It was such a waste of money it’s now being investigated by Elon Musk’s Department of Government Efficiency. (DOGE!)

*****

A new survey of 2,000 U.S. adults finds that only a third of those white Air Pod earphones owners clean their listening devices weekly…

-Back in my early “Disc Jockey” days we used to “Spin the Wax”… but that’s kinda gross. 🤪

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday!

-Dick

The Lions absolutely destroyed Jacksoville yesterday… 52 to 6… They’re now 9 and 1…

Meanwhile my hometown team the Buffalo Bill beat the defending Super Bowl Champion Kansas City Chiefs 30 - 21… Go Bills!

*****

Yesterday President Biden authorized Ukraine to use U.S. Missiles INSIDE Russia for the first time in the Russia/Ukraine War… a move experts say move us dramatically closer to World War III.

-So other than that… How was your weekend?

*****

Spirit Airlines filed for Chapter 11 Bankruptcy protection this morning.

Industry leaders say this means Spirit passengers will experience long lines, delayed flights and disruptions in service. In other words… Business as usual.

*****

On Sunday, Joe Biden became the first President to visit the Amazon rainforest.

And he liked it so much he ordered another Rainforest from Amazon to be deliver to the White House in two Days because he has Prime.

*****

The Pentagon failed its seventh consecutive audit on Friday as the agency was unable to fully account for its massive $824 BILLION budget.

- I don’t know if this would help them out or not… but I always stash my receipts above the visor in my car. That way I always know where they are. Maybe the Pentagon could pick one tank where they put all the receipts?? Just a thought.

*****

Australian scientists have developed a method of accurately checking if milk has gone bad by using the vibration motor inside every smartphone.

Or you can just do what people have done for centuries… have your husband sniff it.

*****

A new survey finds that roughly 50% of Americans say they messed up their marriage proposal.

- And that’s just the Women who said “Yes”.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Tuesday!

-Dick

It’s National Pickle Day! And Yes… It’s a Big Dill !

*****

President-elect Donald Trump met with President Biden at the White House yesterday… with the two men shaking hands as they sat in front of a roaring fire and Biden saying, “Welcome Back”.

-This was an even warmer welcome than Hitler got when he rolled into Paris in 1940.

*****

On Friday, Mike Tyson and Jake Paul will finally meet in the ring. Mike is 58. Paul is 27… that’s a 31 year age difference! The fight will take place at AT&T Stadium in Dallas and will be streamed on Netflix starting at 11pm.

- Are you going to watch? I’m all eyes! And in Mike’s case… All ears!

*****

A new study confirms that there is in fact a decline in the African elephant population.

-Boy… if anybody was going to remember to Procreate, you’d think it’d be the Elephants. (With their amazing memories).

*****

According to a new study, the number of damaged packages arriving on doorsteps has soared by a third in the last year.

-Luckily most people don’t realize their packages arrive damaged… as they're stolen by porch pirates before they even get to them.

*****

A new study has found that people who only drink beer tend to have significantly poorer diets compared to wine drinkers.

- That’s because Red Wine pairs nicely with Beef, White Wine pairs beautifully with fish and Beer tends to pair well with anything Deep Fried and covered in Cheese.

*****

Spirit Airlines is reportedly in advanced talks over a possible bankruptcy filing following a failed merger and continued financial struggles.

- And Spirit has informed me that I’m going to have to charge you an extra $5 dollars for reading this story. Sorry!

*****

HBO executives now say that the “Harry Potter” reboot series won’t be on TV until 2027.

- The British haven’t disappointed us this badly since Prince Harry married Meghan Markle.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday!

-Dick

Liberal women - angry that their boyfriends and husbands voted for Trump, claim they are going on a 4 year Sex Strike as punishment.

Kinda sounds like they're trying to Make Celibacy Great Again!

*****

A new study finds that vintage clothing in thrift shops can be covered in disease-causing bacteria.

But it’s cool because it’s “Vintage Bacteria”… not the Modern stuff you can pick up at Walmart and Amazon.

*****

A baby goat stranded on a Hawaii cliff was rescued by members of the public after four days.

That story again…

High on a hill was a lonely goatherd

Layee odl, layee odl layee-oo

Loud was the voice of the lonely goatherd

Layee odl, layee odl-oo

(You get the drift…)

*****

A Singapore family court has banned a Woman from entering her brother’s bedroom to clean it against his will.

- Don’t you hate it when people air the family’s dirty laundry in public?

*****

Police in California arrested a naked man found hiding in a crawl space beneath a 93-year-old woman’s house in California after an intense struggle.

I should note here… the struggle was with the 93 year old woman NOT the naked man. He gave up without a fight. She said it was kind of nice having a man around the house.

-*****

A man took to Social Media looking for advice after his wife filed for divorce after finding out that he voted for Donald Trump. In a post that’s gotten more than 12 MILLION views, he said she, “Won’t even talk. She says it’s Over.”

That womans’ name… Dr. Jill Biden.


*****

Prayers and Good wishes this morning to our friend Dave Coulier… who announced that he’s been diagnosed with stage 3 Non-Hodgkin lymphoma. Dave, 65 is the nationally known comic who got his start right here in Detroit - appearing at Mark Ridley’s Comedy Castle and on my shows many times - and went on to star in “Full House” with John Stamos and Bob Saget, who died in 2022. - said he went to the Doctor with an upper respiratory infection that caused major swelling in his lymph nodes - and that’s what led to his diagnosis. "Three days later, my doctors called me back and they said, ‘We wish we had better news for you, but you have non-Hodgkin's lymphoma and it's called B cell and it's very aggressive. [I was] feeling like I got punched in the stomach because it never happens to you. You always hear about it happening to someone else.”

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday!

-Dick

New video shows President Biden tripping, stumbling, and almost falling as he tried to walk across a sandy beach near his Delaware home. (And his wife, Jill didn’t even try to help him).

- I think we’ll all sleep better knowing Joe is storming the Beaches of Delaware… and not Normandy.

*****

Questions about how genuine those Celeb endorsements of Kamala Harris were… now that the checks have cleared. Turns out her campaign coughed up big cash:

Beyonce……… $10 MILLION

Megan Thee Stallion………$5 MILLLION

Lizzo………. $2.3 MILLION

Eminem……….. $1.8 MILLION

Oprah $1 MILLION (although Oprah has denied she personally received payment - it went to her productions company, HARPO)

-That’s how much the celebs were paid for their endorsements. I think that’s called putting YOUR money where THEIR mouth is.

*****

Students at Universities in Washington, Oregon and other states around the country are finishing up the week off they were given to deal with the "Trauma" of Trump winning the election. Schools offered students - including GRAD SCHOOLS - calming music, coloring books, arts & crafts and emotional support animals to "hug" during this stressful time.

- Wait til they graduate and find out their parents aren't going to pay their cell phone bills anymore. 😂😂😂

*****

A new study finds that platforms like TikTok and Instagram can pressure guys to keep working towards a more muscular physique, even if they are already fit.

- Tell me about it!

*****

Three new toys were inducted into the National Hall of Fame this Year… My Little Pony, Phase 10, and Transformers.

Ripped off again… my Pet Rock!

*****

A woman in Thailand had to endure severe pain for nearly two decades after medical staff left a needle in her birth canal while she was delivering her child… and it was only found when she complained of pain years later.

- A little surprised her HUSBAND didn’t mention anything 😲

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Wednesday!

-Dick

Biden’s team is said to be putting the blame for the Dem’s Election loss squarely on one person’s shoulder’s: Nancy Pelosi. They say if she hadn’t forced Biden out of the race… Joe would have been able to defeat Trump.

-That’s up for Debate… (Of course the “Debate” is what got this whole Roller Coaster going in the first place!)

*****

Kamala Harris called President Trump yesterday to congratulate him on his Victory and to assure him that she would assist in a smooth transition of power.

- It's nice to know that after all the name calling and mud-slinging, she's there to help... Willing to help Trump unburden his administration of what has been.

*****

Kamala finally came out and made her concession speech about 4:30 yesterday afternoon - more than 12 hours after Trump crossed the magic 270 Electoral Vote number.

Now we can all get back to what’s important… Watching those annoying commercials with Martha in the giant black glasses telling us we only have a few more weeks to sign up for our Medicare Part B Advantage Plan!

*****

During an episode of her “Let’s Be Honest” podcast, Kristin Cavallari, ex-wife of Miami Dolphin’s Quarterback Jay Cutler said that she will only date a man who’s had a vasectomy.

I was going to listen to the whole interview.. but all I could find was a little snippet.

*****

The Late Night Show Hosts are losing their minds over Trump's victory… Jimmy Fallon said that America “got back together with its crazy ex” while Stephen Colbert hysterically admitted he's “not doing great”. He then thanked everyone on his crew and tried to make the point that people who hated Trump were “not alone”.

- Well you know what they say... “Misery loves company”.

*****

MSNBC consulted a doctor on ways to navigate to stress now that Donald Trump has been elected... including "Deep breathing", "Taking breaks from News & Social Media", "Being Kind to Yourself", & "Naming five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, and one you can taste". (TRUE)

- For example... the thing the Harris/Walz campaign is "tasting" right now is "Defeat".

*****

Experts say the Election results showed a wide rejection of the lefts "Woke" agenda.

- Ironically, America has finally AWAKENED to the fact that it doesn't want to be WOKE anymore.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday!

-Dick

Former President Trump celebrated Halloween a day early… rolling up to a campaign stop in Wisconsin in a Garbage Truck, taking reporters questions from the passenger’s seat… then delivering his speech at the rally while wearing a sanitation workers vest. The move came in response to President Biden referring to all of President Trump’s supporters as “Garbage”.

-Looks like Joe set off a bit of a Dumpster Fire.

*****

Note to Trick or Treaters who may be stopping by my Neighborhood tonight:

As per usual… I will be waiting for the doorbell - with a big pot of Chunky Soup and my ladle in hand!!

See you there!

*****

The Dodgers became the first Major League Baseball team ever to comeback from a 5 run deficit in a Game 5 comeback to take the World Series last night … 4 games to 1 over the Yankees. Just moments after the victory, excited Dodgers fans in LA lit a bus, looted a NIKE store, and threw lit fireworks at Cops.

Oh wait… it turns out they were going to do that anyway.

*****

Arnold Schwarzenegger endorsed Kamala Harris for president in a lengthy X (Twitter) post yesterday.

- He’ll be explaining his decision in more detail when he joins Kamala’s husband, Doug Emhoff for a “Dudes-Who-Knock-Up-Their-Nannies for Kamala” Call later today.

*****

During a recent interview, Tom Hanks admitted that he “made every mistake” as a father. I

-Well… Having kids is like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get.

*****

According to a new survey of 2000 lunch eaters… Americans' # 1 Favorite Sandwich is…… Grilled Cheese! 42% of us say its our fav followed by Chicken (40%), Turkey (30%) Ham (27%) Tuna (24%), Egg (21%), PB&J (21%) and Meatball. (19%)

-And that’s NO Baloney!

*****

A new study found that half of young Americans between the ages of 12 and 17 spend at least four hours each day on their Smartphones.

- And ironically, I’m afriad it’s making them dumber with each passing hour.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday!

-Dick

Six years ago today my wife Gail passed away from complications after a 22 years long battle with Ovarian Cancer. The girls and I miss & love her than you can possibly know.❤️

So sorry to see that actress Teri Garr has died of after a decades long battle with Multiple Sclerosis at the age of 79. Garr… who got her start as a background dancer in Elvis movies - was a unique blend of pretty, quirky and funny that you don’t see that often in Hollywood. She was in “Tootsie” with Dustin Hoffman and in one of my all time FAVORITE movies… “Young Frankenstein”… where she played the Brilliant Gene Wilder’s assistant, “Inga”.

“Put. The Candle. Back.”

I love that line and ’m lauging just thinking about it.

Rest in Peace, Teri.

*****

Half the people in this country woke up feeling like Garbage this morning. Why? Because last night, that’s what Joe Biden called Trump Supporters.

- The preceding story was brought to you by those big green GFL Garbage trucks with the yellow letters on the side.

*****

A new survey finds that 65% of Americans aren’t confident in the safety and reliability of Cryptocurrency.

And of that 70%… Half think “Cryptocurrency” is one of the Dinosaurs from Jurassic Park.

*****

Chinese scientists recently unveiled an innovative new type of building material they hope will be used to build the world’s first inhabitable houses on the surface of the moon.

- And those new houses will need new windows! So look no further than Wallside! They ARE the factory!

*****

Lionsgate Studios has announced that Johnny Depp will star in their new movie “Day Drinker.”

- No word on his leading lady… but my money’s on Nancy Pelosi or Britney Spears.

*****

Kanye West has reportedly purchased a $35 million mansion in Beverly Hills after remodeling his former Malibu estate into a “bomb shelter.”

- These days, who among us hasn’t at least considered investing in a bomb-shelter Time-Share somewhere Warm?

*****

RIP… Lee Alan… Detroit Radio Personality for many years has died just days short of his 90th Birthday.

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday!

-Dick

P.S. Happy Birthday to my #3 Daughter, Jill today!!!! ❤️

Tom Selleck says he's "frustrated" by CBS's decision to cancel his popular Cop show "Bluebloods" after 14 seasons and says he thinks the network has "taken the show for granted".

-Now that Tom's out of a job... Money's gonna be tight. I wonder if he's thought about a Reverse Mortgage?

*****

A new report says that New Jersey was once home to a fiery volcano roughly the size of Mount St. Helens.

It's true. Chris Christie used to toast Marshmallows over it when he wanted S'mores.

*****

A man and woman have been arrested after their “amorous” actions at an Australian train station damaged a water pipe and flooded several platforms.

- Talk about the Little Engine that Could!

*****

Two Social Media “Influencers” were lost at sea after refusing to wear life jackets while taking selfies on a Yacht off the coast of Brazil known as the Devil’s Throat. Friends say they refused the vests because they didn’t want to have “embarrassing” tan lines in their pics on Instagram.

- If they think the tan lines are embarrassing… wait til they check out the obituary.

*****

Tom Brady’s ex-Wife Giselle Bunchen is pregnant! The 44 year old model announced that she’s expecting a child with her Ju-Jitsu Trainer boyfriend - two years after splitting from the Quarterback. According to celeb website TMZ.com, Bunchen is 5 or 6 months along - so we can expect a delivery early in 2025.

- To put this in Football terms: We’re in the 2nd Half, 3rd Quarter… And it looks like Giselle pulled a Quarterback Sneak on Tom. 😏 🏈

*****

ELECTION DAY IS ONE DAY FROM TODAY!!! But You Can Vote NOW!!!! Make Your Voice Heard!!!!!

🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Wednesday!

-Dick

So… What a weekend, eh?

The Lions crushed the Titans 52-14… at Ford Field in Detroit.

Michigan pulled it out over MSU 24-17… at Michigan Stadium in Ann Arbor.

And depending on which channel you watched… there was either a Pro-Trump Patriotic, Make America Great Again Rally or a replay of 1939 pro-Nazi Rally at Madison Square Garden in New York City. The ridiculous comparison has led to some prominent voices demanding the network(s) have three broadcasts licenses revoked.

At least in Sports you always know the actual score.

*****

Trump sat down for a three hour interview with Podcaster Joe Rogan Friday and told him that that he once told Kim Jong Un that he should “just relax” and “go to the beach.”

But Kim was afraid he wouldn’t look as good in a bathing suit as Joe Biden.

*****

A recent national survey found that most people are actually OPPOSED to using injectable weight loss drugs instead of simply making diet changes.

-When it comes to taking off weight… People are actually willing to give dieting a Shot.

*****

An Italian man has been struggling to adjust to daily life following a hit-and-run accident that put him in a coma and ultimately erased 39 years’ worth of memories. He can’t even remember his own family.

-Thanksgivings gonna be a hoot at his house this year.

*****

Police in Miami say they’ve busted a. man who stole a trailer filled with $100,000 worth of frozen bacon.

- Consider this today’s “Slice of Life” story.

*****

An Alabama husband and wife duo may have broken a Guinness World Record by growing an Okra plant that reached a height of 16 feet, 10 inches.

- Needless to say, Their mama and daddy are soooooo proud!

- Just kidding. Hey… Didn’t Okra just endorse Kamala Harris?

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Tuesdat!

-Dick

With less than two weeks to go until Election Day... the gloves are officially off with both campaigns fighting to get out their final message and land their final blows against their opponent. As of this writing… Pundits say the race is pretty much too close to call.

*****

A CNN legal expert says that President Biden's comments about locking up former President Trump were “profoundly stupid.”

- Well that’s always been my motto. When I’m going to be ”stupid" I alway try to be “Profoundly Stupid".

*****

A study of 1,000 adults from seven swing states found that 61% of parents are worried about whether their children will be able to buy a home as they get older.

- The the other 49% just opened the door to the basement and yelled down, "Hey... Don't forget. Rent due on Friday.”

*****

Arizona has seen the steepest housing cost increase at 38%.

But it’s a dry housing cost increase.

*****

The first 22 seasons of the popular “Pokémon” series have found a new streaming home for free in the United States.

- Thank goodness! I'm a big fan of Pikachu but I'm only through season 15 and I'm tired of paying an arm and a leg for it!

*****

According to a new book, John Lennon once had “loud, raucous sex” with a woman at a party — and his wife, Yoko Ono, could hear the entire ordeal.

- Well I “Imagine” that didn't go over too well.

*****

A recent survey from Realtor.com reveals that about 23% of Americans say Politics influence their decision on where to live.

For example… If you’re conservative, you tend to live in suburban and rural areas, and if your Liberal - you threaten to leave the Country if Trump wins.

*****

A Malaysian woman who took care of her bedridden husband for six years following a car accident recently announced that he divorced her and married another woman following his recovery.

She made his bed. And now he's gonna lie in it with someone else.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday!

A new poll finds 2 in 5 Americans will experience “Daylight Saving Anxiety” when getting ready to set our clocks back an hour on Sunday, November 3rd.

- Well, Duh… That means we have to wait ANOTHER HOUR to find out who won the election on Tuesday, November 5th. Like this thing hasn’t gone on long enough…

*****

During a speech yesterday, President Biden said that we need to lock former President Trump up in Prison.

-Well that is a step down from trying to take him out completely!

-*****

To keep traffic flowing... a New Zealand airport posted a sign in its drop-off zone asking passengers and their drivers to limit their farewell hugs to a maximum of three minutes.

- By next week, the airlines will be allowing you one free hug and kiss if you’re in Business Class - but if you fly economy, you’re gonna have to pay extra for a hug or check your emotions at the gate.

*****

A recent study found that superhero movies can promote prosocial behavior — actions that benefits other people or society.

For example, Superman can inspire people to do do Super-Human feats... and Batman inspires guys to wear tights, a cape and drive around in a convertible chasing a giant Penguin.

*****

Authorities in Hong Kong say they arrested an older man on suspicion of indecent exposure after residents reported seeing him exercising in a public park in the nude.

-Wait… that’s not something you’re supposed to do? (Asking for a friend)

*****

During a recent interview, Patriots Owner Robert Kraft revealed how Tom Brady broke the news that he was leaving the team back in 2020. Kraft said that Brady came over to his house and started crying.

- That’s the same thing players used to do when they found out they been drafted by the Lions.

NOTICE I said USED TO DO!!!!! That was THEN. This is NOW!

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday!

-Dick

A new survey finds that an overwhelming majority of teens and young adults are worried about how climate change will affect their future.

My friends and I didn’t worry about “Climate Change” We called it “Weather”. Hot in the Summer. Cold in the Winter. As long as we had a Hose and a Shovel… we were good.

*****

Kamala Harris is taking heat for holding a Town Hall Meeting that only allowed “Pre-determined” questions to be asked… in other words - another scripted event. NBC’s Maria Shriver was forced to admit it to the audience when asked live on the air by a viewer.

- Well as long as we can get Putin and Xi to agree to submit questions/statements ahead of time, you know before any bombings/nuclear attacks that kind of thing… we should be cool if she wins, right?

*****

Medical researchers say music might do more than just lift your spirits – it could actually help you recover faster after surgery.

For instance if you’re having Gallbladder surgery… you might want to listen to The Rolling Stones.

*****

A study of 2,000 nationally representative Americans revealed that 36 days of our year are lost to scrolling, streaming, and bingeing content on our phones, computers and TVs.

- I keep this blog short so I only waste a few minutes of your time. Your welcome.

*****

An Idaho man set a Guinness World Record by blowing a playing card across a room 33 feet in a single breath.

-What’s the Deal with that?

*****

Congrats to Britney Spears who says she’s “Married Herself”… The troubled pop star posted a photo of herself wearing a white silk nightgown and a lace veil in the living room of her mansion. This is Brittney’s 4th marriage.

-And sadly, at this point, I’m pretty sure she’s registered at ‘Bed, Bath and Beyond Need of an Intervention”.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Wednesday!

-Dick

It’s International Day of the Nacho. I Say Order Extra Refried Beans and Let the Chips Fall Where they May!!!

*****

Donald Trump told a story about Arnold Palmer at a rally in Pennsylvania that ended with the former Commander-in-Chief insinuating that the Golf legend’s manhood was legendary.

Apparently Arnold Palmer was a real Milton Berle.

*****

Speaking of Trump... Cars lined up for blocks as he donned an apron, made Fries & worked the drive thru window of a McDonald's in Pennsylvania Sunday.

- Not to be outdone... the Harris Campaign announced that later today, Kamala will be doing Five Guys. Wait... That didn't come out right...

*****

Kansas City Chiefs Quarterback Patrick Mahomes says that Taylor Swift bakes with his 3-year-old daughter.

- And he said when they get flour all over themselves you know what Taylor tells his daughter to do?

Get a towel. (You thought I was going to say “Shake it off” Didn’t you? One of her biggest hits)

*****

Delta Airlines is giving its cabin interiors a fresh look with new seat fabrics, mood lighting throughout the plane, and memory-foam cushioning in some cabins.

- Opening the door on a whole new way of traveling. I just don’t want the doors to open "while" you're traveling.

*****

“Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur” has been cancelled.

Which begs the question … what is “Moon Girl and Devil Dinosaur?!”

Apparently, the plot revolves around a young super-genius who accidentally brings a ten-ton T-Rex “Devil Dinosaur” into present-day New York City via a time vortex.

- Great. Now New York is a Sanctuary City for DINOSAURS, too??

*****

RIP... Rob Kress... Red-headed Meteorologist and part of the Channel 7 News Team that included icons like Bill Bonds, Diana Lewis, Doris Biscoe & Jerry Hodak back in the 1970's and 80's has died. His family said he died peacefully at his home in Grosse Pointe on September 28th. He was 77.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Tuesday!

-Dick

Kamala Harris’s interview with Bret Baier Wednesday night - her first with Fox News - is being described as “adversarial” and “testy”. Here’s how it went down: According to Baier, Kamala showed up 17 minutes after the agreed 5pm start time. That meant they only had 20 minutes instead of the agreed to 30 in order to get the interview done and turned around in order to broadcast at 6pm. At the end, he said 4 of Harris’s staffers were waving their arms for him to “wrap it up” quickly. Either Kamala didn’t want to answer anymore tough questions Or those 4 guys had to go to the bathroom.

*****

The owner of Lay’s, Doritos, Tostitos, and Ruffles say they’ll start putting more chips in some bags to bring back customers tired of higher prices with skimpier bags - what experts call - “Shrinkflation”.

-Not to be confused with “Shrinkage” which happens!!

*****

Former President Jimmy Carter fulfilled his rumored wish of living long enough to cast a vote for Vice President Kamala Harris… when he voted early at the age of 100 in Georgia this week.

- And, of course if he dies before the election… he’s going to vote for her again.

*****

According to a new survey, 68% of U.S. Adults say they support Banning Cell Phone use by High School Students in the classroom.

Without the distraction of phones, it’s easier to stay focused on learning and having sex with the teacher!

*****

Taylor Swift announced that she will release a book documenting her Eras Concert Tour next month.

- She’s making it a Picture Book so her boyfriend Travis Kelce and his football player friends can read along, too!

*****

Rapper 50 Cent announced that he'll make $15 MILLION playing 6 shows at the Planet Hollywood Resort and Casino in Las Vegas starting December 27th.

-In related news… Singer William Hung was spotted in Vegas putting 50 Cents into a Slot Machine at the Casino at Planet Hollywood. (With Christmas just months away… Don’t forget his album, “Hung for the Holidays” available on Amazon.com.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Friday!

-Dick

It’s National Dictionary Day! So crack open your copy of Websters and read for a Spell!

*****

Kamala Harris will sit down for her first ever interview with Fox News tonight. It will be hosted by Bret Baier, pre-recorded this afternoon - but will be aired in its entirety with no edits and no commercials. All eyes are on the sit-down since CBS and ABC have been accused of deceptively editing their interviews with Harris to make her appear more favorable. But Baier is no Trump fan either, so…

- You’ve heard of a Fox in the Hen House… What will happen with the Hen in the Fox House?? Stay tuned…

*****

Nancy Pelosi says she still hasn’t spoken to Joe Biden since she and other top Democrats forced him to drop out of the 2024 race for President back in July.

-If I were Nancy, I’d have my fingers crossed that Joe didn’t pick my name in this years Democrat Secret Santa Gift Swap.

*****

A new cake shop at Disney World is taking heat for its crazy high prices. The menu posted outside the bakery shows a SINGLE SLICE OF CAKE priced at $22.

-Well that’s just Goofy.

*****

A new study reveals that quitting smoking at any age can significantly extend your life expectancy.

-Unless of course, you’re about to be executed by a firing squad and they offer you a last cigarette. If you say, “No thanks. I’ve decided to quit”, I don’t think it’s going to extend your life.

*****

Officers were dispatched to an Ohio neighborhood over reports of a a "runaway pumpkin." Officers arrived and video shows a large inflatable pumpkin blowing across the road nearly knocking two officers down. Luckily, backup officers arrived and the pumpkin was returned to its relieved owner.

-If you think the owner was relieved… You should have seen the look on the pumpkin’s face.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Thursday!

-Dick

Another October Surprise… Kamala Harris is being accused of Plagiarism in her 2009 book “Smart on Crime”. An Austrian Professor found 27 instances of plagiarism in the book - which have been corroborated by journalists and the NY Post - including passages taken directly from - get this - Wikipedia. No word yet from the Harris Campaign…

Not even a copied and pasted one.

*****

Firefighters and police in New Hampshire were called out to the home of a resident who found a Moose trapped in their swimming pool.

- The Moose, identified as a Mr. Bullwinkle J. Moose, Said “Thanks. But I wasn’t trapped… I was Sunbathing. Hey Rocky… Watch as I pull a Rabbit out of my Hat!”

*****

On Friday, a woman from China pleaded guilty to attempting to smuggle 29 Eastern Box Turtles, a protected species, across a Vermont lake into Canada in an inflatable Kayak. The woman was arrested and now faces 10 years in Prison.

- If she had smuggled them into America, she would have gotten a Medal and the illegal Turtles all would have gotten a free phone, a prepaid debit card and Free lodging in a Five Star Hotel !!!

*****

CNN’s Anderson Cooper was filmed getting smacked with debris while covering Hurricane Milton in Bradenton, Florida.

Which is a change… Usually he’s filmed getting smashed on Vodka while covering New Year’s Eve in Times Square, New York.

*****

Lottery Officials announced that beginning in April, Mega Millions tickets will more than double in cost… going from $2 to $5 per ticket.

- Which can only mean one thing! Now you can blow through your life savings… TWICE AS FAST!!!

*****

An Indian man set a new Guiness World Record for the World Smallest Fully-Functioning Washing Machine. Serbin Saji designed the machine - which weighs less than an ounce and measures just 1.28” x 1.32” by1.52 inches. But it’s not a toy… the tiny washer runs a full cycle — wash, rinse & spin.

-Next, he’s going to make a tiny little dryer, so every time you do laundry, you can loose one-of-each-pair-of your-tiny-little-socks.

*****

Have a great day and I’ll see you back here Wednesday!

-Dick